Friendship

 

Girlfriends are your biggest cheerleaders.  Maybe not when you are in your 20’s, when you may be more competitive or where it may seem that some will stab you in the back or you see them nasty to other friends, but when we get older.  We all travel on the same treadmill and have similar issues and problems.  Its nice to know people support you no matter what the issue is.   As we age, for me personally, you sort your friendships out into categories (I’m a big pie chart kinda gal)….all based on maintenance…High, Medium and Low. You will recognize the High Maintenance; talk about themselves mostly, always has drama or some truly non-existent crisis (their hair stylist is moving to New York now they need to find someone new – how will I ever survive- lets discuss for 20 min.). The worst trait of our High maintenance friend is if at the last-minute you have to cancel meeting up, they will be pissed at you…no matter what the reason. Because in some way you have offended them and they make it all about themselves. When you leave after meeting this person you are EXHAUSTED mentally.   The Medium Maintenance has all the above only less intense. Medium also doesn’t talk incessantly about them self but sugar coats their life where you want to barf , because you see their life and you KNOW it’s not this glorious.  I would classify this friend as not being authentic or genuine….even when you pour your guts out about the messes in your life…..theirs is still candy coated with puppies and rainbows.  You want to hit them because they need to take the rose colored glasses off as you can see right through them, they are only fooling themselves.     Low Maintenance friend you can talk with for hours.  Not speak to for a year but once you talk its like you just saw them yesterday…nothing awkward or resentful for the lapse of contact, because really…..everyone is busy and fighting their own battles that have nothing to do with the friendship.  You can cancel 30 minutes before meeting for dinner and its OK, or better yet you can say “Im just really tired can we do it another night”  and they will say “sure , I get it, no problem”.  AND THEY MEAN IT.  This friend isn’t afraid to say to you that they disagree with you and here is why, and this makes the friendship stronger as there is no resentment just growth.   SO, as we age you realize who needs to stay and which friends you pull away from and all you are left with are Low Maintenance friends…..and if you are lucky like me…you have many like this.  My step mother ,Verena, once told Morgan and myself…..”sometimes, like cards, you just need to put some people in your life in the discard pile”.  Friendships do go to the discard pile sometimes.  Maybe the friendship ran its course or helped you when you needed it to , but due to circumstances just has a hard time fitting in your life now.     People in my life fit on a pie chart…..everyone takes up a wedge.  Some have bigger wedges but all are needed.  Some friends are wild, some calm or motherly or wise or funny.  I need them all to make me balanced and whole.  I feel bad for  a lot of men as they don’t nurture their friendships….and want their wife to fill the entire pie chart…  leaving them eating cherry pie their whole life  (ok that was inappropriate but you see what I meant)….I love a good analogy.   My point is filling your life with just one person leaves you very closed off/ homogenized and sterile.  There will be no personal growth.  It really does take a village to give you different experiences and perspectives so you can grow, think and form your own personal perspective on life.    So thank you to all my friends.  You are all needed and loved for who you are and what you bring to my life and this world!!!

 

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More Bugs

Here’s everyone’s favorite subject:  Bill and his first world problems.   

Besides his adapting to the Iphone, the bugs are getting to him.  He has this massive bullet hole (bug bite) smack dab in the middle of his forehead.  Weston called him Raj Gupta and started talking to him in an Indian accent the other day….yes very stereotypical but hysterical when Weston does an accent.   Bill was complaining that everyone at work was staring at him. My guess is no one is really staring that much or actually cares that much, just Bills inflated ego.   The real problem was not that he just let it alone…..he tried to pick it like a zit , so it is huge and inflammed.  Then yesterday, I mistakenly mentioned a small bruise on his bicep ….above it was a bug bite .  Turns out he thinks now he either has lyme disease (rogue tick LEAPED up his arm) or West Nile Virus (mesquito).  Oh the Drama!   I also have bites on my chest and ears and ankles….but alas I am a mortal human.  Bill is special and deserves WHO or the CDC  to check into his issues!  

Enjoy your weekend….I will be bug and Bill free in Chicago!

Another day in Iowa

 

 

 

 

 

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Things are status quo here.  Weston is still applying for jobs but thinks he will now head back to Wyoming soon as there is work there for him. I have hired  him to do  the lawns.  Grass grows at least 5 inches a week, but to find out we are doing a science test this week and measuring it. Yes, life is a hoot here!  The bugs are so bad now that Weston wears ski goggles to mow!   He has been great about being home and I love having him but Im sure he is going crazy having  me as his “best friend”..   We are doing some fun things….just to make it more tolerable for him…and me.  We went fishing yesterday…caught nothing, but had fun tooling around the lake in a small motor boat.

We are heading to Chicago on Friday (My Iphone is repaired and ready to be picked up at Apple on Michigan Ave).   Weston hasnt been yet so I hope he enjoys it….He will enjoy the food!

Hope everyone is well